Friday, February 23, 2007
1980 ~ 2007what does the figure above mean?it means i'll be 27 this year.. late twenties...sound so scary...thinking back what have i achieved the past 26 years... almost nothing... besides obtaining a degree... completed my CPA...and i dont even think they are called achievements...sigh.. Godi'm such a rebellious kid..do whatever i want and always taking daddy for grantedkeep drifting away from himlosing my passion and my first lovebut i'm really greatful to have him with me all the timeregardless of the number of times that i've failed himi want to feel him..love lifepeople of my batch are getting attached, married...even giving birth...honestly i do worry at times..but i know i'll leave it to god...if i meant to be single... i'll try to enjoy single lifestyle then...though there are times that i too need care n love...but i too am scared... will someone even love me knowing my past?and this part of me... just keep reminding me of the great wrong that i've done... maybe i deserve to be alone.. but oh well... at least daddy is with me...possession...my dogs n my car my job..my little treasure... guess i'm really not ambitious enough... i'm quite happy with the little that i have though at times will want my own dream home..but with my spending and saving pattern... mmm dream..it is a dream..friendshonestly i have a lottoo many to keep track about...i'm not proud of it... in fact quite guilty...cuz my fingers r more than enough to count...how many of them that i really put much effort in maintaining the relationshipbut i'm thankful that i'm never lacking of friends aound me..being it a huge group or a couples of them..they are all gifts from daddyfamilyi do think i'm rather cold-blooded at times...being away from home all these years...i'm hardly homesick..looking at my parents at their old age...i still cant make up my mind to go back and be with them...sigh.. such a failure in this areadeamsi have all kind of dreamsn i day dream a lotbut as time passes bythey seems to slowly fading a waybut nowi want to catch some of themeven just 10% of itat least i trythat's why i'm doing the dancemaybe i can still sustain more than a few movesi want to try..at least give it a trysigh..27 is so so scary...i feel sooooooooooooooooooold
Searching @ 2:59 PM*