Friday, February 23, 2007
Doing my reading this morning...titled "Guard Your Heart"its about having the right mind, right attitude and right focusits about so long as we have God in our heart... every other things will seems so much smaller...its about helping ourselves to let God help us...its about...God n Usour daddy truly knows whats in our heart n what are we going through..n he makes sure u know he knows n he cares...life has been rather peaceful lately...everything seems to have come to an end...i'm not sure whether its the stillness before another stormor truly peace have fallen upon our life...i should be glad... i should be relax... i should be lighten... i should i should i should...but i am not..or at least...not wholly...dont know since when...there seems to be a hole in my heart...deep in my spirit...where can never be filled...where i constantly feeling empty and lonely be it alone or in a crowd...where the emptiness brings anxiety n fear...fear of uncertainty... of future..of life and of people...u would say... only god can fill this part of me... i tried... but i'm still constantly overwhelmed by the hollow feelings...sometimes i thought maybe friends will do the trick...and i did enjoy their presence, care and all the laughter they brought upon my life...but that wouldnt last... not long enough to last me through the night, the week..the months..my mood fluctuate tremendously ... n there's no reasons to be traced...and i dont like this... so i thought... maybe i'm being too greedy...not contented of what i have and who i am... so i tuned down further... constantly examining myself n reflecting my life..again... it wouldnt help.........mental blocked...
Searching @ 2:40 PM*